Yes Means No ? Jun18


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Yes Means No ?

No means Yes?


Enough motivational speakers have glorified the power of a ‘yes!’

Undoubtedly it opens doors to the road less traveled, one for the road, a blind date, the forbidden fruit, the foreign film you must watch, the new gig in town, strange animals for exotic cuisine, fashion faux pas, Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds, hitting the snooze button, an extra helping of calories, and sometimes even a nihilistic calculated risk (refer: arranged marriage). It’s a tough world out there for a poor no.

At the outset might we add that this is an impartial observation of an aspiring literary cursor, with no intentions of being the Devil’s advocate – because that would be a pro bono with the soul on clearance sale (read: internship).

The paradox of choice has never been restrained to black and white. Sometimes its 64 squared. To further convolute the matter sometimes one may tread into grey areas – these are the pansy maybes and idiopathic ‘can’t says’. To pick a bone, namely of contention, with a potential ‘yes’ is that it’s often just a lie. It is the kind of truth that garbs in a fairness cream. How often has a no been misconstrued?

It’s simple, loud and clear. A no can perhaps be a little difficult, destructive, demanding but never an obligation. Deceptively akin to a bureaucrat but actually similar to a brutally honest best friend (needless to say brutal honesty is a two way street, with no signboards).

Enter scientific bent of mind – perhaps in whose cryptic honour the longer arm of every chromosome was labeled, q. The ideal experiment to segregate from the gene pool the compliant yes person and the defiant no would perhaps be labeled The Salesman – Bar Council for Beelzebub.

The author has spent a sizeable chunk of her  evanescent youth either procrastinating (rarely) or patronizing them (mostly). The gravity of the situation is such that she may very soon be featured on episode of Cribs -The Hoarders Hall of Fame.

Salesmen are a flummoxing species that function like X-Men. Their most recent attack was in the ladies locker room at a gym. They had been deployed at the very spot to cash on thriving endorphins by using women’s unmentionables as bait. They were turned down by couple of teenagers. Young ladies today are demure no more, a no is no!

Unfortunately, weak willed author has the yes facies. Even as she staged a patient listening session, the internal monologue pleaded the need for speed. Sometimes the think tank works only when cornered like Courage – The Cowardly Dog,  To cut a long story short, the new protocol for this crisis management is neither yes nor no, its run!

Mitigation pending but for now, it works!